Guilt
by Yautja's Blooded Pet
Summary: Kakashi struggles with guilt, as does Naruto. They often need reminders that they are both human and that some things just can't be promised. After a year in captivity, there are a few bumps in the road before they find peace with themselves.


**This piece is old..but back when I had the idea floating around my head- I burnt out the entire night until it was on paper. It is rushed, poorly slapped together, and requires a complete overhaul to be what I consider as "good." However, I put my heart in it. I'm not happy with it and it could use a lot of critique, so please point things out for me, should you feel so obliged.**

* * *

Plip.

It didn't drip, it plipped.

Plip.

Not that it really mattered. Naruto couldn't hear it anymore.

Plip.

Once these drops of water drove him crazy! He'd do anything to shut them up but now...now he couldn't hear them. They were filtered out, gone. Something he couldn't take in for the sake of his sanity. His ears worked still, somehow, but all that dripping faded away.

Plip.

It is funny, how the brain works. If someone doesn't use something for a certain length of time, those bits get forgotten. Unused things, things that aren't as important as one's current state of being go forgotten. Certain memories...sounds... sometimes these things can deemed useless in the greater face of survival.

In losing track of the seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks...somewhere along the line, he started forgetting.

Plip.

It was terrifying.

Plip.

First he focused on a face. Bandana, light hair, carried a senbon in his mouth. From the exams, right? A jounin... a jounin that Naruto had even seen since the exams. Why...couldn't he remember his name?

Fuck.

It wasn't long ago, was it? How long...was he...?

Plip.

How long has he been here? How long would he be here? ...What was going to happen to him?

Naruto whined and grasped his head in a tight clutch, a familiar creeping shadow of despair slowly clawing its way up his throat, threatening to tear up his chest cavity.

Don't! Don't think about it. Don't worry. Don't fuss. Stop feeling bad. It hurts- feeling bad hurts so much and it doesn't fix a damn thing. Just stop. Slow down...quit thinking about it. Breathe- ...what was that?

Plip.

"I really must do something about that leak."

Forty six. This person, his captor, has visited forty six times. With the same god-damned greeting. The same...damn...

What does he want from me?

Plip.

Naruto slowly sat up, the chains that drained his strength and chakra clinking across the floor. The words thrown his way resounded in his skull and echoed throughout his prison. Naruto licked his lips to wet them, he breathed out as if he were testing his vocal chords to respond but ...he didn't. He didn't speak to his captor anymore. Naruto used to throw back sharp barbs and rained death-threats from the sky, but now? Now it is pointless. He had been there for so long and his friends hadn't found him yet. Were they still searching for him?

Striped blue and white hat, black eyes, black hair...cover-alls. What was that boy's name again?

Plip.

"How are you alive? You really have no business breathing right now. Though...if you did die, I'd miss you, my pet." His captor smiled and crouched, the sound of fabric scratching along the rough stone floor. Naruto remembered what he looked like once, he could recall the details of the man's face but right now...

Plip.

Now Naruto has been kept in the dark for a long, long time.

"No smart-ass comments now, I see. I think we really have bonded, little one. I hope we can continue to get to know each other... I think we can even like each other. You're my favorite, you know. You are the best pet that I've ever had. None of my other pets could keep me going like you..."

Naruto was supposed to scout out an area a long time ago. In that particular area, people kept disappearing. Tsunade didn't think that Naruto could be taken like the rest of them. The thought just wasn't possible. And now? Did they know he still lived?

"No-one adores you like I do, even your friends. They're not half as frantic to find you as I thought! They need to go away. They're really being a pain."

Naruto jerked and cursed himself. Truth? Lie? Does any of that have a meaning anymore? Did...this man have a reason to lie to him? Did they forget about him? Do they know he's still a hostage?

"Ah! I was worried you couldn't hear me, pet. Do you want to hear more about them? I'm sorry to say, one of them got caught on the gates. That chakra of yours is really nasty. Made short work of them. You're one less friend now."

Naruto's heart stopped, his breath caught, and a cold numbness spread through his body. Lie? Truth? Does it matter anymore?

My chakra killed one of my friends.

Plip.

Please...please just let me die.

* * *

Miyazawa really enjoyed these stolen moments. He loved his quiet time with the little blond pet, enjoyed how his temper and fuss slowly fizzled into gentle, acquiescent silence. He so loved the quiet, the gentle drops of water along the far wall as the only passing of time. These room, this moment with his little one was completely restful and quiet. It wouldn't be too long before the little kitten was broken, solitude always breaks pets. Always works. And he wanted to touch his little pet and hold him like a pet should be held. His pet had already done so much for him, the sweet thing. He was safe because of his pets, he used their energy to mask his workshop and protect his little hive and this was a pet that never ran out! What a pretty, perfect pet.

Miyazawa rubbed the back of his hand along the scruff on his face and smiled. His pet couldn't see him, he needed to know his place. Pets weren't meant to see how to get out, after all. Pets should be blind and listen only to their master. This pet is almost ready. Almost.

And then his perfect moment of silence was shattered by two distinct noises.

The first noise, was of the far wall exploding. He shouted and shoved himself immediately in the opposite direction when light and water crashed in from the outside.

The second noise, the last sound that he heard before the world went dark was that of his little pet's screams. His little one was screaming.

* * *

Kakashi had nightmares of the time that Naruto was missing. Thirty weeks, two days, and eleven hours ago, Naruto completely vanished while on a recon mission that went south. Thirty weeks. Seven and a half months.

Sure, they found him...but that didn't make him feel any better. If anything, Kakashi felt worse than the moment when he realized that Naruto was past the acceptable term for "late." He let the enemy hold his student for thirty fucking weeks. He had been with therapists and doctors ever since, the damage was so severe... Sakura still hasn't stopped crying. Sasuke immediately demanded the right of Miyazawa's execution before the council and Kakashi couldn't sleep because every time he closed his eyes, he could hear Naruto screaming. Dear god, the screaming.

Tsunade said that his eyes would recover. She had to help the healing along a bit, but now that he was no longer rigged to that fucker's defense system, the fox would be able to do the rest. Kakashi still felt like such a goddamn failure. Naruto shouldn't be hurt at all. Naruto should never have been taken at all. It shouldn't have been possible.

Sighing, the jounin sat up in his bed, knocking aside a shuriken patterned quilt before pulling on his pants and mask. He might as well enjoy the moonlight. Perhaps he should apologize again, to his sensei, for letting his son slip out of his hands?

Naruto was somewhere between disbelief and euphoria. When the light first hit his face, all he could think of was the searing pain. He couldn't do anything but shriek and claw at his eyes and no matter how hard he pressed, the pain wouldn't ease up. No matter which way he twisted or turned to cover them, they wouldn't stop burning. He couldn't seem to keep the light away from his face and everywhere hurt. He twisted and the chains twisted with him until he was a small cocoon of sobbing seal-laden metal and pain, burying his face into the rocky floor and wishing he could still dig deeper.

Sakura. Naruto remembered Sakura's name easily. She was an integral part of his life and her memory was far too strong for him to forget in the eternity that he had spent in that hole. Her touch, though unnecessarily bright, was so soothing to the pain that tore their way through his head. She was an angel in that moment, blocking anything that hurt through her own distressed noises. He only had a brief second before the world went dark that he found that hearing kind of hurt a little. So much noise- there was so much noise that he couldn't sort out the sounds. But it was okay, it would be okay- everything was okay now, because his friends were here. And he no longer hurt. Thank Kami for Sakura.

As he lie there in the hospital bed, running his fingers over the texture of the coarse cotton sheets, he had to wonder, was this real? Was he really here, or was this another dream/fantasy that his head cooked up to pass the time? Were there shackles around his limbs? Did he really make it out of there? Is his captor waiting around the corner with the sound of a smile on his voice? Is this reality? That...man said that his friends were still around. If that is true then...

Fuck.

Which one of his friends was dead because of him?

And just like that, the jinchuuriki's world came crashing down like a tidal wave, those dredges of euphoria quickly evaporating into the cool Konoha air. Someone was dead..and thanks to his overconfidence all those months ago, it was probably...maybe...most likely his fault.

It was only a lack of practice that kept him from noticing someone at the window, he was so lost in his own grief. The shutter sounded closed and Naruto jumped at the sudden, resounding sensation. His hearing was still sensitive, though he could finally sort out some noises from others. Right now? Footsteps. Soft footsteps on the floor- he had a visitor. Clearly startled, Naruto tried to sit in a rush, but had to settle back down in a fit of dizziness and coughing that left him reeling and trying to puke. Despite being back for a little while, he still wasn't used to light or sudden movement.

"Easy...easy..." soft spoken, almost lazy words softly tumbled over his face. The voice was familiar...he knew that voice. He knew those lazy, gentle tones. Naruto would be relieved as soon as his stomach would stop clenching. At least this voice was alive.

"You're on some pretty rough painkillers. You need to take it slow."

Kakashi slid his arm underneath Naruto's shoulders, gently and slowly lifting him up. The line of something met the bottom of Naruto's lip, splashing tiny and minute amounts of moisture onto his mouth. Naruto smiled and drank deeply at the offered water, something he had once taken for granted in the past.

He remembered his name. Thank God.

"Kashi..." Naruto sounded out slowly before he reached out with his left hand. He trailed his fingers along Kakashi's arm, feeling the variance of texture between different pieces of Kakashi's armor. Yes. Kashi...no. Kakashi. Two images attempted to complete themselves in his head, both with startling silver hair. Naruto had hoped to see his hair again.

"S'that you? Really you?" He continued to murmur, one part delirium mixing with his former state of being. Having company that wasn't Sakura, Tsunade, or a doctor for his head was going straight to his brain in a mix of excitement and adrenaline.

"Yeah. I'm here..." Kakashi's words tickled his ears and they were so soft and slightly hollow, reminiscent of the man. Kakashi was always a gentle man, despite being a legendary ninja but this aching hollow sound to his words? It sounded like his former sensei was in pain.

"Is everything okay?" Naruto asked. Kakashi cringed, thankful for his student's temporary lack of eye-sight. He wasn't so good at cutting off his visual cues right now.

"Everything is okay but you. Are you okay?" Naruto frowned. Liar. Kakashi was lying to him. He could hear that second of hesitation that perhaps, he never noticed before. He could hear the shudder in Kakashi-sensei's breath. Kakashi ached. For what? And then, Naruto remembered. Was it because of what I did?

"He said someone died. On the gates. My chakra killed someone. Who...who was it?" Naruto wouldn't mince words and he wouldn't beat around the bush. He needed to know the truth. Now.

"Ah..." A pause. Kakashi slowly leaned Naruto back onto the pillow and the blond could hear almost invisible footsteps leading away from him. A sharp shriek followed, before a gentle plop. Kakashi must have pulled up a chair. And he still hadn't answered him. The waiting was starting to irritate the bed-ridden boy.

"First things first, he didn't actually die. He was one of the new chuunin. He thought he could break through and took the opportunity but misjudged the gap between Miyazawa's crazy stolen chakra defenses. He's...living."

"Living?" Naruto echoed. For all the years that he knew Kakashi, the man's wording always indicated when things went sour. He pushed for a little more info.

"How bad is he hurt? My ...chakra is no joke." Kakshi smiled sadly and sighed. Naruto's chakra was cool and inviting, but the chakra that met them at the gates? That chakra was hot and angry. Miyazawa's ...strange yet innovative system drained not only Naruto, but the fox.

"He's...burned. Badly. May not be able to use his chakra again. But! He's mentally sound. I have a feeling Hokage-sama may relocate him to an office position when he recovers." Naruto cringed. No ninja wanted a desk job. He's alive though, right? Everything is okay as long as they were still breathing?

What a pretty little lie to tell himself.

"How long was I there? What...is today's date?" Naruto felt so blind. He fiddled with the banadages around his head, wishing he could pull them off to look at his former sensei. Did he change at all in the eternity that he was gone? Is he giving him that same eye-smile? Was he wearing his usual uniform? Did he still have that bright, striking silver hair styled in its usual- oddly natural way?

"November second." Those two words were so toneless, and abrupt. Naruto was silent. He didn't move, he didn't speak. His whole being, for a moment, was still and Kakashi squirmed in his seat, waiting for thrown accusations and angry questioning.

"Naruto...I'm so sorry. I should have gotten there sooner. I should have-"

"No...No I... Kashi. I can't remember when I was taken. I can't...do the math right now." Naruto rolled gently onto his side, mindful of his head.

"I don't know what happened...or how long it was...I can't. I just...can't." His breathing shuddered and he sounded at the edge of tears. His voice dropped to a whisper, "I'm a little scared... I can't remember some things like names or ...dates. What happened?"

After a moment of thought, Kakashi reached over to pat the side of his knee, letting him know that he was still there. He reeled in his own feelings and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You've been gone for a long, long time. Its okay. Don't be scared. It'll come back."

Now for the hard part.

"It took...forever...to find the trail where he took you. It was the weirdest thing, it was almost as if every single scent or visual mark had faded straight into the air. There were some..crazy seals set up here and there we haven't seen before. It took so long to find you and when we did? Well. Every wall, every stone was a death trap. Eventually, it took two and a half weeks to tunnel underneath the lab where he kept you. We couldn't use chakra or we'd set off some...nasty defenses. It took so long to find you..and I'm so, so sorry."

Naruto was silent, and it broke him a little. Kakashi needed him to scream at him. He needed him to blame him and tell him to leave. Kakashi needed Naruto to reject his apologies. He needed him to understand that it was all his fault...but Naruto wasn't saying anything.

Footsteps. Time for evasive maneuvers.

"Maa...they're coming to kick me out..." Kakashi reached up behind his head sheepishly, despite the fact that his student couldn't see it. He slid the chair back with a screech and tousled Naruto's hair. "After all, it is around zero-two hundred!" Naruto grinned and chuckled, which gave Kakashi pause. Angry, accusatory teenagers didn't chuckle at one's escape attempt.

"Of course...you're late. Visiting hours end at seven."

Late. Fucking late. Kakashi has head that word more than any other for years, but right now, it tore straight through him. He was always late. He was late to work, late to meetings, late to dates, and was too late to save his friends. He was too late to pull Naruto out of there before he was hurt. Did it really matter whether Naruto was mad at him or not? The fact is, he should have done better. Should have been better. ...Fuck.

Kakashi stealthily left via shunshin to head back to the memorial stone. It would be many hours before he'd quit stealing time from the dead.

* * *

Sakura and Lee walked Naruto up the stairs to his apartment despite the insistence that he'd be fine. His eyes were a little hazy, but he knew the way to his own apartment. Sort of.

"I hope my plants aren't rotting..." he commented conversationally, irritated by Sakura's quiet and ignoring Lee's fifth lap up the stairwell they had just managed to climb.

"Between Yamato-taichou, Iruka-sensei, and Kakashi-sensei, they should be just fine!" Sakura smiled, explaining how the three had haunted his apartment in between Naruto-hunts.

"Iruka-sensei?" Naruto chuckled and grinned at her, confusing the pinkette for a moment. "Then I know everything is dead! Iruka can't keep cactus alive and Kakashi probably just raided my cabinets." Sakura's eyes narrowed and she pouted. Naruto just laughed harder.

Puffing slightly from the climb, the pair continued to ignore Rock Lee's declarations in favor of watching the green machine race himself down the hallway on his hands. Sakura shook her head and walked behind Naruto to keep from being bowled over.

"I don't think it'll be that bad since...Yamato-taichou was here?" Her protest was weak and she knew it. Naruto had a tendency to figure people out better than she did sometimes.

"They probably called him in for damage control. Damn...I was working on a tomato-crossbreed for the bastard, too." Sakura shook her head, wondering if she should go get Ino to fix things if they were as bad as Naruto insisted.

Finally reaching the center of the hallway, Sakura had to stick a leg out to stop Rock-Lee mid-lap.

"Chill, would you?" She admonished. "He's still injured and can't keep up with you! You're making us dizzy!" Little Sakura and the Sakura of today still shared a few personality quirks. The Sakura of today still had a habit of putting up a fuss, even if it were only to hear Lee's part-apology, part-love declaration that would immediately fly up her way. Requited or not, such things were apparently good for a girl's ego?

"My apologies, my flower! My youthfulness was too much to contain!"

"Good thing I don't have neighbors..." Naruto mumbled before disabling the last of his traps. He pushed open the doorway and Sakura followed him, hoping that the sensei/senpai trio didn't totally ruin Naruto's apartment, though she'd be shocked if they did. Still, there was a chance. When she ambled in, all she could see was green.

"...Woah..." She stepped around the branch of a plant in a rather little pot for how tall it was.

"Well...the good news is that everything but the tomato is alive. The bad news is that...they definitely brought Yamato in. All of these plants are supposed to be miniatures...and I think they fed off of him a little too much. This one in particular is supposed to be ...I dunno. Maybe a foot high, tops." Sakura's eyes widened. That particular plant was starting to scrape the ceiling.

"I'll have to plant them all in the yard and start over, though I can get some really good cuttings from that one over there..." He pointed to a corner where one particular shrub was blooming in gauzy white flowers. Finally Sakura had to agree with Naruto's earlier assessment.

"Well, none of them know how to trim houseplants apparently. A for effort, though and definitely better than leaving everything to rot. What happened to the tomato?"

Naruto shook his head and pointed at the balcony, where a sickly and shriveled stalk was currently leaning over the banister. It looked, quite frankly, gross and slimey compared to the small forest started in the living room.

"Tomatoes are extremely delicate and sensitive, which is most likely why they're the favorite food of our pansy-ass teammate."

Naruto grinned over his shoulder at his Sakura's sudden choke and glanced at Lee, who was oblivious to anything going on at the time. The green monster was unusually quiet but seemed to be enjoying himself, settling down in the woodland that had taken over Naruto's living room. If only plants wouldn't erode the walls over time, he mused. It would be awesome to leave them overflowing and taking over. Naruto shook his head and started toward the kitchen, wondering if it was in a similar state of disarray.

Naruto was pleasantly surprised to see a lack of growing things (including the mold that was starting to develop its own civilization in the corner when he left. He remembered that! He lost a pair of chopsticks to it.) Sakura smiled when she opened one cabinet to see it packed full of goods. Ramen, snack foods, fresh milk, other goods, and a ...lonely, misplaced dog biscuit.

Naruto took the biscuit from her and grinned. "...Bisuke?" Sakura giggled and nodded. Poor Bisuke probably didn't get his biscuit again. Kakashi is probably wondering where he left this.

"Well...at least Kakashi-sensei made sure you could eat since the stairs are going to be a tough challenge for a bit." Naruto shook his head and smiled. Maybe he should keep a tin of these around.

"Hey Sakura?"

"Hmm?"

"Would you do me a favor?" Sakura raised a brow. "Go get me a tin of these. The good stuff. Can't feed a nin-dog crap, you know. Gama-chan has a few ryo you could use."

"You know...we haven't really spent time with them outside of giving them baths and mid-mission tracking. We should invite sensei over and give everyone a scrub." Sakura leaned up at the counter and missed the surprised expression that crossed Naruto's face.

"Everyone, Sakura?" Naruto leered and it took several seconds for her brain to catch up.

"NARUTO!" She raised her hand to give the boy a well-deserved smack and stopped a half second after his initial flinch. Damn. She can't hit the boy until he's fully recovered. Naruto continued to snicker at her.

"I'm just saying, nothing says team bonding quite like stripping down for a..."

Screw the anti-abuse rule. He's getting what he deserves.

* * *

Sasuke sighed, agitated. It isn't like the dobe to be consistently late. A week after Naruto was released from the hospital, he was declared fit for stairs. He was supposed to meet them at the bridge for training ever since and he's late for it. Every day. Worse than his idiot-sensei late. This wasn't like him at all.

Kakashi appeared to be unconcerned, from what he could tell. They spent the last few days attempting to sharpen Naruto back up to the warrior he used to be, but it just wasn't working the way he had planned. It wasn't that Naruto was weak, per say, but all his senses were off-kilter and he seemed to be unable to keep his mind on task. Sasuke opened his mouth to speak, just as idiot-sensei interrupted him.

"Meeting canceled. Report in to the Hokage for a solo mission. I and I alone will be heading to Naruto's to see what is up. Clear?"

Sasuke scowled and glared at his team leader, clearly irritated at having his own battle-plan pulled out from below his feet. He didn't bother protesting, as the last hint of insubordination earned him with a three acre trek searching for discarded weaponry at the bottom of training ground twenty three's swamp. Kakashi gave him his usual two fingered dismissal and disappeared in a mist of smoke and leaves.

Contrary to popular belief, the shunshin was not a perfect technique. Kakashi landed, rather than beside the picket fence of a house that was a block away from his student, inside the fence and more importantly, inside a bird bath. Sighing, he leapt out, swept some chakra down his leg to deal with the water, and glanced around to make sure no-one saw him. He had a reputation to keep, after all. The jounin lounge would never be the same if they knew how often he ended up in places that were...less than perfect. Kakashi sped off towards his destination, the familiar high-rise of Naruto's apartment building protruding from the edge of the slums like an old monument. With a few calculated jumps, Kakshi neatly landed on the eighth floor.

The jounin knew something was wrong the moment he slid the window open. The air felt dark and heavy while the usual cheery, recently trimmed foliage (weren't there more plants in here than before?) seemed to be a facade to cover the oppressive air emanating from the back where the bedroom was. Something was clearly off.

Kakashi palmed a kunai, dampened his chakra signature to that of a tiny mouse and crept down the hallway along the ceiling tiles. He had yet to teach this technique to his former students, but then, he really didn't want them to learn anything that had to do with traceless assassinations.

The shower was on in the bathroom, and Kakashi's eyes narrowed when he made his way through the open door. It wasn't like his student to continuously be late because he was feeling a little less than fresh. The jounin soundlessly eased his feet back to the floor and shifted into a low stance, the very tips of his finger pulling back the curtain to check and see that it really was Naruto. He froze, when he found something that he didn't expect.

At the bottom of the tub lay his former-student, shivering and curled in on himself. His shoulders, arms, and legs were covered in what appeared to be self-afflicted lacerations and welts, most likely from his nails.

Kakashi dropped the kunai, a sharp clang resounding through the tile and kneeled, pulling the curtain further back. Naruto jumped to turn toward the sound and freezing drops of cold water flecked against Kakashi's mask.

"...Naruto..?" He spoke softly and calmly, hoping that the young man didn't balk or try to lie to him about whatever was going on.

"I can't get it off..." Naruto whispered, blushing. Kakashi blinked, confused, before he watched Naruto roll his palm over his knee cap.

Oh kami! Skin. His skin!

When someone isn't able to bathe for extended lengths of time, extra layers of dead skin form on the dermis. The dirt, oil, and dead skin cells become rather elastic and have a hard time peeling off of the body, so it does so in layers.

Tiny rivulets of rolling skin kept peeling down Naruto's arms every time he brushed his hand over something. Each time, it appeared that he'd get it all, only for the skin to start peeling again, leaving soft grey mush underneath his nails. They stuck to him insistently, resisting the water's attempt to sweep the goop down the drain. And the tears! Naruto was crying. Desperate, frustrated, ashamed, helpless tears. It was likely that he didn't understand any of what was happening to him. It takes weeks to make the excess skin go away. How many times had he been late this week because he was busy clawing at himself in the bottom of the tub?

Kakashi didn't really think about what he was going to do about the situation. Perhaps he only did what he could. The elder reached up to knock some heat into the cold water, kicked off his boots and climbed in, pulling a nude, welted Naruto in his lap.

They knew he wasn't okay since his abduction, but they (being Tsunade and the other concerned personnel) had no idea how this "not okay" would manifest. Kakashi wasn't sure if this should stay off of the record or not.

They stayed like this in silence for a while, until Naruto's hot water was gone and wounds slowly closed, the still-tired fox stirring just long enough to stitch the boy together. Kakashi reached up with a long, gangly limb and nudged the water off. He wrapped himself back around his frustrated kohai for warmth and waited for the blond to come to terms with everything, as well as to figure out what to say. He was just frozen there, unable to offer him any sage advise or calming knowledge. He was never really intended to be a teacher.

"I can't remember his name." Kakashi blinked, looking down and shifting his left hip. That entire side of his body had fallen asleep.

"The kid... White hat, blue stripes, cover-alls...Black hair, black eyes. Saved our hides after I yelled at him on that one...mission..." Kakashi shifted again, ignoring the needles and trying to help Naruto out as much as he could. One mission...that one...oh. Right.

"Inari." He supplied, turning to watch Naruto's face twist into something dark and unpleasant.

"I forgot him. I forgot Inari...I promised I'd never do that." Naruto stared at the slope of Kakashi's vest pocket, soaked through from all the water. The pocket rose and fell with his former sensei's breathing, the laquer painted snap that held the top down was chipped around the edges and flat at the top from over-use. Naruto could almost see the thumbprint where his sensei would reach up and gently, soundlessly pry it open. What did he keep in there, anyway?

"Been forgetting things often?" Kakashi asked, following the pattern of Naruto's expressions.

"People that I haven't seen in a while. Hell, the first time I was late to our team meeting? I got lost..." Naruto laughed mirthlessly, the despair that he trapped for a while creeping into his mood. "I got lost in my own home and I forgot people important to me."

"You know...its okay. You were alone for so long in there... sometimes the mind does that, when it thinks that there are other things that are more important," spoke Kakashi, attempting to be assuring. Naruto squinted and frowned.

"What could be more important than the people who are precious to me?" Lifting his face, he locked eyes with his sensei.

"Getting out of there, for one." Naruto shook his head, clearly disagreeing and perhaps ignoring the truth of the situation. Kakashi couldn't really judge him. It was so much easier to brood over a situation than to admit human weaknesses.

"That isn't what I meant and you know it. Your primary human drive is to survive,everything else is something that your instincts will find to be lesser. There is no shame in that." Kakashi ran his palm over a chilled shoulder and ignored the way more skin clung to his gloves.

The blond shifted his hip off of Kakashi's right leg, opting to settle between his limbs despite the awkward positioning. He was sure that his weight was killing Kakashi's thighs at this point. Neither one of them mentioned the position they were in, the anatomy now pressed up against Naruto's side, or the blond's continued state of undress. Now wasn't the time for such thoughts or remarks. Kakashi sighed.

"I'm sorry Naruto. I wish I had gotten you out of there sooner." Kakashi's chest ached, but it was high time that he came clean with it. He had been ignoring social visits with the boy for some time now, opting to stick to professional meetings that he couldn't avoid. Naruto sighed back, staring once again at Kakashi's equipment pouch.

"S'not your fault," he murmered into the wet canvas, settling his cheek over what was probably a wad of ruined explosive notes. Comforting. In fact, now that he was somewhat calm, how was Kakashi's equipment? Did he remember to take out Icha Icha?

"..I was late again..." Kakashi's whisper was not a whisper at all, it was too loud and accusing- echoing throughout the bathroom, and Naruto's eyes widened. The jinchuuriki finally caught on. His senpai blamed himself for what Naruto went through. Something that Naruto was blaming himself for.

"You're an idiot, sensei. Know that?" Kakashi glanced down, fixing his puzzled eye on Naruto's face, grown pale from the chill in the room. That was not the statement he was expecting. Naruto met his gaze unrepentantly.

"None of what happened to me is your fault in any way, shape, or form. If anything, it was mine because I was caught. Or hell, we can go all Neji on this and blame fate. Shit happens." Kakashi sighed, but his eye softened. Wise, but potentially true in reverse.

"And forgetting distant people, precious or not, isn't yours. You haven't failed them, Naruto."

"And you didn't fail me." The emotion pouring over his shoulders hurt and yet felt so good at the same time, almost like relief. Kakashi fell silent and temporarily focused on his person, shifting his kunai pouch farther away from Naruto's exposed body. He didn't know what to say and Naruto just smiled at him. Once more, there was silence as the pent-up everything from the past few days bled out onto the ceramic and tile.

Naruto glanced over to the counter-top, deciding to end the moment.

"You ...did take out Icha Icha before you got in here, right?" Kakashi blinked and chuckled, running the arm holding Naruto over his shoulder again. It was dry now, but Kakashi found himself dusting off skin bits. It would take a while before Naruto would feel clean again.

"No worries. That pouch is waterproof. In fact, I became proficient at seals just for that, with how often I ended up in the water." An eye-smile was leveled Naruto's way for his adorable concern. Naruto glanced at his belt. The Icha Icha pouch was settled right underneath his...oh.

"I'll bet it is killing your ass right about now." Naruto's signature foxy grin slowly stretched across his features. Kakashi chuckled and his eye followed the masculine curve of Naruto's side and hip that trailed down the line of his own body.

"Perhaps you shouldn't bring up anyone's ass right now..." Kakashi mused, not even hiding where his eye was currently roaming. He had never looked at a former-student this way before, but it wasn't exactly unheard of in the shinobi ranks and Naruto, despite his lack of common sense, was most-certainly something to look at. He would look even better once he was a little better fed and less emaciated.

Naruto caught on and blushed, turning to hide his face into Kakashi's vest. Now idiot-sensei brings it up. Damn it. How was he going to get out of this one with his dignity intact? If anyone saw him right now, he'd catch hell for it for years. He swallowed and tried to calm himself, finding the only thing he had to go on, which right was sheer bravado and gall. If all else fails, pull a teme. Bluff like you never have before and don't be sorry about it.

"You know...I certainly don't hear you complaining." Naruto borrowed that particular tone from Sakura when she was being flirty. He pushed up to a sitting position, still between Kakashi's legs and dared to meet eyes with the elder. He ignored the way Kakashi's eye widened in shock and then pretended not to notice that same eye that drifted down barely-there hair marking a soft blond trail down the line of his body. Don't be sorry about it. Don't be sorry about it... his mantra inside separated itself from his foxy expression, disguising his inner panic at attempting this. He picked his next words carefully.

"Come on senpai. I'm sure you'd rather be dry by now. All that gear is going to chafe..." Without any further statements, Naruto rose out of the tub, all of his glory clearly in view and stepped out. Kakashi just sat there, stunned until a towel dropped onto his head from above.

"Come on, you. I'll cook dinner." Naruto proceeded to make for the living room without pants, hiding his smirk until he made it around the corner. Kakashi gulped. When did his student...grow-up? Like...this?

After a few moments of pulling himself together, and a few convenient jutsu to get dry, Kakashi stumbled out of the bathroom.

Thankfully, Naruto was wearing pants when Kakashi peeked into the kitchen. No shirt, not that the self-admitted pervert didn't enjoy the view. Along the way, Naruto apparently learned how to cook something other than boiled water. Imagine that. Kakashi was sure that he'd be slurping noodles tonight.

* * *

He ended up staying. He wasn't sure how.

At first it was only for a night but after a rather nasty nightmare and a few hiccups along the way, Kakashi just...stayed. No-one really questioned it or even indicated that they noticed that when ever they stopped by, Kakashi was there on the couch. They didn't notice a stack of perverted material that built up in the corner, or the new Yamato-special that appeared to hold them after a week. They didn't notice Mr. Ukki on the table, rather than at Kakashi's place. He was just there, and it worked out that way.

Naruto finally got all of the excess skin off. He didn't have any more panic attacks in the shower though at times, he needed Kakashi's help to remember someone. He couldn't hear water dripping from the faucet if he didn't shut it all the way. At first Kakashi thought Naruto was being lazy, but no. He couldn't hear it. And so, he stayed. And everything, for at least a little while, was okay.

* * *

 **Again, this is rather old..but I hope it was enjoyable. There should be some errors in there somewhere, and some glaring flaws from correction over correction over... Each person does this thing where they have the feeling and tone of a piece inside their chest, so they tend to complete things without reading it. What I mean by that is that a person can glance over something and read it, but their mind automatically fixes bumps in the road. Thus the point of a beta, right? Anyway. Let me know what you think and what you find to be obvious about what I can do as a writer to improve. :)**

Thanks!

~Pet


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